Carry On, Newspaper Club! Gakuen Hetalia
by asymmetricalpasta03
Summary: Based on the strip of the same name. The school paper this month is about the various school activities and clubs! Join Germany, Italy and Japan in the exciting world of journalism as they go through the organizations that are strange, crazy and flat-out illogical and weird. My first third-person story; excuse me if it sucks.
1. This Month's Theme

_And another tangent, distracting me from my at least four other stories _and_ my college assignments. There is a comic about this: the first few chapters will be the comic, slightly expanded, and then I'll make stuff up from there. Also: try to plug the accents and dialects in yourself. I have a hard time writing them in, so I'll leave it to your imagination._

* * *

Germany walked rigid-backed down the hall to the printing room, where the incredibly small journalism club met the first Sunday of every month to discuss the topics on which they'd report.

"Sorry I'm late," he said gruffly, shutting the door behind him. His two fellow editors were already in there.

"Ah, not at all. You're right on time actually," said Japan. Then both boys' attention was directed to the desk next to Japan, from which North Italy raised his sleeping face, eyes opened blearily.

"Wha- Did I miss the meeting again, Japan?"

"We're just getting started," Germany said, dropping his folder on the front desk. He rummaged through the papers he brought and pulled out a sheet he thought couldn't be so buried. "Anyway, the reason I am late today was because I was finalizing the topic for this month's paper. Out of all of our suggestions, I decided that the theme will be club activities."

Japan's stoic face nodded once. Italy's fell into one of disappointment, yet quickly snapped out of it as he cheerfully said, "Well, clubs are nice and all, but why don't we do the story about food!" He looked at Japan quickly, then back to Germany. "Or maybe if we hold a beauty contest -?"

"It's already been decided: this month's paper will be about the various club activities at the Academy!" Germany said, visibly irritated.

"Ve~ Germany, why do you have to be so stubborn?" Italy asked, his face falling again.

"If I may suggest: perhaps we can do the clubs next month, and this month we write about food. I have an article I can write on tea cakes," Japan offered. Italy next to him started singing, "tea cakes" under his breath (or so he thought).

Germany shook his head. "We can't have an entire issue on tea cakes."

"Well, in regards to the club activities," Japan said, raising his hand, "I have heard of several strange clubs, in addition to the obvious."

"Oh, really? Like what?" Germany asked.

"I have a list of unidentifiable clubs here," Japan pushed a paper toward Germany. Germany took it. "One that stuck out to me was the siesta club."

"_What_?" Germany asked, perplexed. He scanned the list; sure enough, the siesta club was on there. "Just what on earth does that club do!?"

"_I know_!" Italy yelled, getting to his feet. "We sleep! I actually hold several positions in that club! We have a meeting tonight I was going to attend!"

The next thing Italy knew, Germany had him in a headlock, yelling "_Join a serious club_!"

After Japan managed to get Germany off, he took the paper off the desk. "Ok, well, one thing certain, the school needs to review its organization system a little."

"Alright," Germany said, getting irritated. "Let's go through this list and weed out the strangest or nonofficial clubs."

"If you take out the nonofficial clubs, there won't be much of a paper left," Japan noted.

"Right. I just think we can do without interviewing the 'bunny petting', 'everything originated from me' and 'siesta' clubs." Italy hung his head. "Fine, Italy, you can put it in the editorial. But a few of these seem…valid, if not downright strange. But I think that the paper _could_ use a bit of this…variety. We just need to make sure we know the difference between unusual and ridiculous. Let's review this list, and we start tomorrow with interviewing club members. Sound good?"

Germany's fellow editors both signaled their agreement.

"Okay, then: you take the first third of the list," he said, handing a sheet to Japan after recopying it some hour later. "I'll take the second, and you…_Italy_!" he yelled. Italy had fallen asleep from the wait. He whacked Italy with his list. "Go do that at your siesta club!" Turning his attention back to Japan, he, still angry at Italy, wound up yelling, "I want your lists knocked down by morning; I'd like to meet before class! You're both dismissed." On that note, Germany left.

Japan and Italy looked at each other. "Well," Italy said, looking at the clock on the wall, "I'll do this later! I have a meeting to attend! See you tomorrow, Japan!"

Japan looked at the paper in his hands and put it away. He'd work on it later, as well.

* * *

_Even when the beginning is literally given to me, it starts out slowly. *sighs* This is my way of building up the story to a point where I have to make stuff up, it just rolls with it. Again, I may start asking for suggestions somewhere along the way, but I have a pretty extensive list, so that may be a few days._


	2. Schedule of Events

_Finally found the second half of the original strip._

_..._

_Thought it was a bit of a cop-out compared to the first half._

_So, this is going to be completely different. The elements will still be there, and I will be drawing off the first half at first. But very little mention of the second half will happen (ok: I thought two were fine)._

* * *

Germany and Italy showed up at the dorms' common room early, Germany nearly dragging a half-asleep Italy down the hall with him. Japan, as expected, was already down there.

"Good, you're here," Germany said, throwing Italy into a chair face-first. As the Italian got to his feet, Japan handed Germany his part of the list. "Ah. At least you did some narrowing. I couldn't get him to do it if his life depended on it."

"But it didn't!" Italy protested. "And I looked through the list, but there weren't any I found I didn't wanna talk to!"

"Italy, you left the **** club on this list." Japan and Italy both turned red.

"I must've read that wrong..."

"Well, between these three lists we should have a half-decent issue this month," Germany said, holding the papers out of Italy's reach. "If for no other reason than there _will_ be a lot to read."

"So, what now?" Italy asked, finally halting his attempts to reach.

"We have to interview the members of each club, that's what."

"So, we now pick where we are going to start," Japan said.

"It would help if we had a schedule of meeting times," Germany noted.

"The siesta club meets at 17:00 tomorrow!" Italy said.

"_Why don't you just write about what you do there and turn it in_?" Germany asked threateningly. Italy shrank back in fear.

"Y-yes, sir!"

"I can ask around later, and also then the clubs know we're coming," said Japan.

"Right. You do that, then. Come see us at break by the bell and we can get started after classes." Both editors gave their understanding and moved out.

* * *

"Here: I asked around and got a rough schedule of some clubs. There's actually a list online."

"Really?" Germany said, taking the paper from Japan.

"And most have a Facebook page."

"We don't have to deal with that, I think."

"Hey, Germany!" Italy piped up. "I can make the journalism club a Facebook!"

"Whatever. But you have to run it."

"So, this one meets right after," Japan muttered, circling the clubs' names as he found their Monday meetings. "And this one...just Saturday mornings?"

"I could never make those," Italy chimed in.

"Well, I'll look over this when I can, but I want to meet you outside the music department right after class. Agreed?" Germany asked.

"Agreed!" Italy said. Japan nodded.

"So," Italy said as he followed Japan back to the class they shared, "which one was first?"

"Which ever Germany-san says."

* * *

_Ok: filler. But next chapter gets into the actual interviews! Yayz! Until next time!_


	3. The Choral Club & Hero Club

_Interview time! I think we'll keep it to two clubs in a story. (Unless they're really short)_

* * *

The trio walked up to the music department and came to a stop in the doorway of one of the rooms. Two nations were inside. Germany went to knock, but Italy, being Italy, rendered knocking useless.

"Hey, Ukraine! Estonia! What's shaking?" His companions face-palmed.

"Oh, hello, Italy," said Ukraine brightly. Estonia turned to look at him. The other two editors also entered, figuring there was no use standing outside.

"You two are the choral club, yes?" Germany asked.

"Well, her and me," Estonia said, "but Latvia and Lithuania are also members, though Lithuania seldom shows up these days. And we tried to recruit Belarus..." Estonia shuddered at the memory; the atmosphere in the room grew heavy.

"So, are you looking to join?" Ukraine asked, while Estonia tried to snap himself out of it.

"No," Japan answered. "We're the journalism club; we write and print the school newspaper. We're looking for an interview about the choral club."

"Oh? Really?" Ukraine said, becoming slightly flustered. "Well, I'd be glad to do it, but I'm not good at speaking."

_But she's a vocal performer?_

"All you have to do is tell us what you usually do in choral club!" Italy told her brightly. "Make sure you tell us everything you can so we can write a good article!"

Ukraine looked away. Then, turning her attention to a normally-functioning Estonia, she asked, "Would you mind taking care of this, Estonia?"

"Not at all," the bespectacled nation said. pushing his glasses up his nose, he said, "The choral club is a gathering of outstanding students. Even for those who attend the W Academy. Like I said, we have four regular members, us three former Baltic states and Miss Ukraine here, though Poland has a tendancy to flit in and out on occasion... Anyway, what we do is we train our voices and twice each year we give a concert, plus some in the neighboring communities. With all the training, we all have exceptional voices, though I've been told that amongst them, my singing is revolutionary," he added, just short of sounding smug.

Both Italy and Japan were sold. "You're so cool, Estonia-san!" he said, while Italy just stared. Germany rolled his eyes.

"Although, there is one drawback."

All eight eyes were now on Estonia. A shadow seemed to have fallen over his face; it was slowly creeping up on Ukraine as well.

"Being who we are...we're often being targeted to rejoin the Soviet Union club," he said, sounding nervous. The shadow wasn't coming from him. All five looked around to the door leading to the adjacent classroom.

"_The evil aura is from in there,_" Japan said under his breath. Italy cowered behind Germany.

"Oh, come now!" said a familiar voice. The aura let up immensely as Russia poked himself out from behind the door jamb. "The Soviet Union club was disbanded years ago!" he said cheerfully.

"Of course, we'e trying to start it back up," said a menacing female voice from behind him.

"_Get out of here, both of you_!" Germany yelled.

* * *

"And the reason you left this _dummkopf_ on the list is...?" Germany said as they went to the next building to meet the next club on the list.

"I thought his take on things would be...well...interesting, to say the least," Japan said, a hint of abashedness in his voice.

"Oh, come on, Germany! This won't be so bad! And if you want, I can do all the talking here!"

The trio found themselves outside a reletively small classroom. "File this under 'unoffical clubs'," Germany growled. Japan took note. Italy reached out and knocked enthusiastically.

In the same fashion, the door flew open.

"Hey, you dudes!" yelled America. "What's up? You're just in time for my awesomely heroic club meeting!"

"Yes, we know," Germany sighed.

"We came for an interview!" Italy said happily raising both his arms in his energetic manner.

"Oh. For what?"

"We're the journalism club. We're writing about the various activities on campus this month," Japan explained.

"No way! This'll be in the paper? Why didn't you say so! Come on in!" The estatic superpower literally dragged Japan and Italy through the doorway. Germany followed.

"Ok, so, what do you wanna know?" America said, sitting on the front desk.

"What is the club; what do you do; what kinds of positions are there, etcetera." Germany started tapping impatiently on his clipboard.

"Well, that's easy! We spread heroism throughout the world! I happen to be the club president! Isn't that cool?"

"May I ask a question?" Japan said, raising his hand to get the younger nation's attention. "Who is 'we'?"

"Oh." America looked around. "Well...we're still in 'recruitment' phases; it may be a while before membership picks up. At the moment, I'm also the VP, treasurer, and secretary."

"Right."

"Getting this all down?"

Germany's eye twitched. "Every word."

"Okay. Wanted to make sure I wasn't losing you, so you can get down all the awesome stuff the club does!"

Japan leaned to Italy. "Do you feel something..._off_ in here? Like from the choral club?"

"First thing we do is -" America was cut off by a sound behind him, under the desk. He looked all across the blackboard before he went on. "As I was saying -"

Something long slung itself about America's neck. The journalism trio went pale as Russia appeared and dragged the nation off the desk.

"What the - Russia - when - how -?" he choked out before being tossed over Russia's back and carried off.

The trio watched it happen, somewhat shocked.

"Should we...go help him?" Japan asked finally.

"Someone will get to it eventually," Germany said, snapping himself back to reality. "Let's go: another meeting is going on now and I want to get there before they leave. And, Japan?"

"Yes?"

"File this one under 'ridiculous clubs' as well."

* * *

_Aren't school clubs fun? I remember them...no, they weren't. So, this is going to be how it happens: sometimes I take it word-for-word from the strip (like Estonia's explanation); others I completely make up (like most of what America said). Sound good? Ok; see you next time!_


	4. The Gourmet Club and Magic Club

_Paste your document here..._

* * *

The next club was held in the home economics classroom. Which made sense: it was in the only wing with a stove.

"So," France said upon hearing their objective, "you want to interview the gourmet club, _oui_?"

Italy leaned to Japan. "How do they get that out of 'guiremet'?"

"I believe that's what I just said," Germany said to France in his usual gruff tone.

France looked at fellow members, Turkey and China.

"Are you interested in joining?" Turkey asked Germany.

"Are you telling me I won't get information out of you if we don't?"

"Well, no, we can tell you, but we wanted to see who else could contribute to the world of culinary masterpiece!" France said.

"I wanted to join this club, but couldn't," Italy sighed.

"We just weren't sure if you were dedicated to the art enough to join. We aren't the cooking club, you know."

"Yes you are!"

"Not exactly," Turkey stepped in. "We may be officers in the cooking club and be affiliated with it, we are actually separate."

"Yes, that club is on our list, too," Germany said, clearly becoming impatient, "but can we kindly get on with _this_ interview?"

"But of course," France said, leaning back in his chair. "Our club activities consist of making, eating, and loving food! That's what the club is all about!"

"Only carefully selected gourmets can join!" China added. "It's why we hold positions in the cooking club: to bring in those who can fully appreciate the art of food!"

"And to keep out those who can't. For example: England is forbidden from the club. Actually, we had considered kicking him out of the cooking club, too. But then he left on his own after setting the cabinet on fire." France laughed at the memory. "So, to summarize: our club is all about -"

"Gourmet food-loving hearts!" Turkey yelled, cutting France off.

"Outstanding taste!" France cut back in, posing, ignoring Turkey's interruption.

"The curiosity to sample anything!" China posed on one knee in front of his fellows.

"Unless it's English, apparently," Italy said, writing on the clipboard.

"They certainly are a noisy bunch," Germany noted.

"They are, aren't they?" Japan agreed.

"Hey, Germany!" Italy called. "How do you spell 'gormay'?"

* * *

The next room smelt of incense for some reason. The journalism trio stood outside, wondering if they should knock.

"I don't wanna go in there!" Italy squeaked. "It reeks of evil!"

"It's not evil," Germany said, and he knocked.

The door opened. Then shut. Then opened fully. Norway was standing there.

"Hello," he said flatly.

"Who's out there, Norway?" called another faintly familiar voice.

"Germany."

Norway moved aside as two more nations appeared next to him: England and Romania.

"Ah, so it is," Romania said, smiling plainly so his pointed tooth showed. Italy shrank behind Germany.

"Care to let us in?" Germany said, pushing himself through anyway between Norway and England.

"Well...we haven't _officially_ started yet..." England said reluctantly. The three stepped back to let Italy drag Japan through.

"So, why are you three here?" Romania asked once the journalism trio had taken a seat.

"We're from the newspaper club," Germany explained for the fourth time that day. "We're writing this month on school activities. We're going around to the different clubs and -"

"Let me guess: you want to interview the magic club?" England asked, cutting Germany off. "Sorry, but this club is the real thing. It's not on display for the general public."

"But this club is...well, it seems really interesting!" Italy said, for an unknown reason starting to revert to himself.

"Oh. Interesting, you say?" England seemed like he was having a small battle in his head. "Well..." he finally said, coming to some sort of compromise, "I suppose if you...can..." He spotted something on the table next to a jar of pink goo. "If you can bend this spoon, we might be able to tell you something. If you won't take no for an answer."

Japan nodded to himself. "The workings of England-san's tsundere circuits are certainly mysterious and complicated," he mused.

"My what?"

Germany took the spoon from England, looked it over and proceeded to snap the utensil in two. The magic club's faces turned blue.

"Wow! Germany's so cool!" Italy exclaimed admiringly.

"Just as we'd expect from Germany-san, the dandy of the EU!" Japan said.

Romania took a small handbook from the nearby shelf and started reading: "'The contents of the magic club's activities include: performing magic to ensure marital harmony; love spells; Harry Potter cosplay; praying for an abundant harvest...and the list goes on. You can borrow my copy later, Japan: I'll give it to you during math."

"That would be appreciated. Thank you for your cooperation," Japan said, turning from Romania, to an always-stoic Norway, to England, head down on the nearest table.

"I can't believe after all the trouble I went through to keep those secrets guarded..."

"So is it really just you three?" Italy asked.

"Well...technically no," England said, bring his head up to face him. "My brothers show up every once in a while, but none of them are as dedicated as we are. Although, this _is _one of the _few_ times Wales has missed...he was here last Thursday. But mostly he observes."

Japan wrote the last few notes and handed them to Germany.

"You know, doing this article has me thinking about these activities and how we'd have a broad range of topics to cover," Germany said as he removed the paper from the clipboard and tucked them in his folder. "But what I didn't think we'd discover was that there are _nothing but abnormal activities at this school_!"

"I know!" Italy said brightly. "Everyone's so strange and interesting!"

"_You three are the strangest of all of them_!" England yelled from his table.

"Maybe we can just call everybody equally strange and leave it at that," Japan offered.

* * *

_First half of original strip: completed! I encourage you to check out the strips or the translations; I love how the author likes the AU of his own characters. Leaves less room for fan wars. (not much less, but less)_


	5. The Canada & Going Home Clubs

_So, in case no one figured it out, I'm using a twenty-four hour clock. If you don't know how that works, take any number higher than twelve and subtract twelve from it, and there's your time on a twelve hour clock._

* * *

"So, is four clubs a good number to stop at for today?" Italy questioned from the back of the group.

"What?" Germany asked incredulously. "It's only fifteen past fifteen! Even _you_ can't be that lazy!"

"But..."

"There are only six more clubs meeting today, Italy," Japan said quietly. "On top of that, there doesn't seem to be much to them..."

"Well, then, who's first, Japan?" Germany asked.

"Well, these three look like they have short meetings, so, I was thinking we all split up and interview them separately."

"But, Japan...I'm no good at the notes!" Italy whined.

"Shut up and do your job, Italy!" Germany scolded. "We'll each take two of these and meet outside the bell before dinner, alright?"

The other two nodded and the trio split.

* * *

"Ah, good, I caught you," Germany said, catching up with Switzerland and Lichtenstein. The duo turned around.

"What do you want?" Switzerland asked impatiently.

"Right. Well, I'm from the journalism club, and we're doing an exposé this month on the school activities, and yours was on our list."

"I don't do school activities," Switzerland said sharply.

"It says you're the 'Going Home After School' club." Germany handed the list to Lichtenstein. Her brother read it over her shoulder.

"All you need to know is when I catch the idiot who listed us, there will be hell to pay."

"Can you tell me what your activities are?" Germany said, pressing forward with the interview.

"What does it sound like? We go back to the dorms after school, do our work, and start over the next day!" With that, Switzerland took his sister by the wrist and led her off. She dropped the note so Germany could retrieve it. He sighed.

"I might fit it in a sidebar or something..."

* * *

Japan knocked on the door at the end of the hallway. A tall blond boy answered.

"Oh, hello, Japan!" he said quietly but brightly. "Is there something you need from here?"

"Ah, no, not exactly," Japan said. "I'm from the school's newspaper, Canada-san, and we're writing about clubs this month. I was wondering if I could have a quick interview, if you aren't too busy."

"Not at all!" Canada said excitedly. He stepped back to let Japan through.

"It's really exciting to be in the newspaper this month!" he said, taking a seat at a desk adjacent to Japan's.

"So...this 'Canada' club..."

"Oh, it's not meant to be vain! It's about the land and culture of my country!"

"It sounds interesting, and I wasn't suggesting vanity. What do you do?"

"Well, like I said: we just enjoy what's great about Canada! We have club t-shirts...almost."

"Almost?"

"I can't order any under a minimum purchase, and I only have two members," he said sadly, pointing at the bear on the front desk. "But the t-shirts aren't really important (though I have one of my own I brought). Our other activities include having pancakes with maple syrup, and we roast marshmallows while sitting around a campfire and sing while visualizing our mountains!"

Japan nodded, mildly impressed. "Actually, that sounds like the perfect way to enjoy life. Wonderful!" He wrote the last few notes on his clipboard.

"Really?" Canada said, almost not believing what he heard. "Do you want to join? I have plenty of openings! You could even be an officer! And we'll be one closer to ordering t-shirts!"

"I'm rather busy with other things at the moment, but I will think about it, definitely."

"Alright, Japan," Canada said, following Japan to the door. "Great talking with you! See you Wednesday!"

"Indeed. Thank you for your cooperation."

* * *

"Hey, _Fratello_!" Italy called as he ran to catch up with his big brother. The southern half turned around and a shadow fell over his face.

"Oh, great. What do you want, Veneziano?"

"Ok, so -" he said before collapsing from the exertion. Romano rolled his eyes and pulled his little brother to his feet. "So, you know how I'm in the journalism club, right?"

"And?" Romano said, becoming irritated.

"We're writing about clubs this month! I got assigned to your club!"

"_My_ club? Does it look like I have a club?"

Veneziano held out the list. Romano took it and read where Germany had underlined "Going Home After School club 2."

"Who has the first one?" Romano asked confused, handing back the note. Veneziano shrugged.

"Maybe you can combine!"

"Unlikely."

"So, what do you do?"

Romano turned and walked away.

"Ah! _Fratello_! Please! Germany will kill me if I don't bring back some material!" Veneziano yelled, running to keep up with his brother.

* * *

_I'm giving in. Someone requested about half the second part, so I'm just doing the whole thing. The ending won't be the same, though! Though I might keep the ending, but do it differently. I may finish all the canon clubs, but I'll also keep going! I'm really looking forward to the meeting on Wednesday...(evil laugh). Well, not literal Wednesday; here we're still on Monday. But that might wind up being the longest chapter._


	6. The Micronation & Elephant Appr Club

_It's been a little while, hasn't it? (Got loaded with other crap to write last weekend; else _something_ would have been updated). _

* * *

The trio set out again immediately after classes on Tuesday afternoon. They had just met up and were setting out when they were interrupted.

"Ah! There you are!"

The trio turned around. A group of young students was standing behind them.

"Yes...we're right here..." Germany said, unsure of how to deal with the eight before him. The apparent leader - a short boy with blond hair - was still pointing at them. A girl at his side forced his arm down; his expression didn't change.

"And...what do you want?"

"We want an interview! We heard you're doing school clubs and we want you to interview ours!"

"_He _wants you to," the girl emphasized.

"Er...okay. Italy," Germany said, thrusting the clipboard into Italy's chest. "So, who are you?"

"We're the Society of Future Nations!" Germany put his head in his hand; _now_ he remembered why the kid looked familiar. "I - Sealand - am the club president. Ladonia - "

"And what exactly do you do?"

"We promote ourselves and nations like ours - "

"Last time I checked, you weren't nations at all."

"Their club isn't on our list," Japan said.

"Of course we are! They don't call us 'micronations' for nothing! I've even had international dealings, and our treasurer Wy has actual recognition!" Sealand said, pointing at the girl, who looked very much like she didn't want to be there.

"My _one_ visit to your place was not a sign of recognition," Germany said, becoming annoyed.

"And our secretary Ladonia - "

"I'm NOT the secretary, I'm the vice president!" said a short red-haired boy with a mark across his face.

"No, Seborga is vice president, he's been around longer than you!"

"By that logic, he should be president, because he's been around longer than all of us!"

"You might just want to walk away while they're arguing," Wy said to the journalism trio. Sealand continued over her, effectively drowning her out.

"That can't happen, because that usurps my position as club founder!"

"Are you saying he can't run things as well as you can?"

"He's the secretary of the _siesta club_!"

"That's the only officer position I don't hold," Italy said to Japan.

"Well, if that's all you have to say, we have other clubs to interview," Germany said loudly. He motioned to his fellows to follow, leaving an utterly confused Sealand and Ladonia behind them.

"We have better things to do," Germany said to Japan and Italy, "and I _doubt_ we've seen the last of them."

* * *

"Ah!" Italy said, running up to the (relatively) small elephant on the grounds. "It's so cool!" Japan and Germany couldn't help but stare at it.

"How did you get this on the school grounds?" were the only words come to Germany's mind as India approached him, Thailand right behind.

"We borrow him," India said simply. "You can get closer; he won't bite."

The four approached the creature, already being fussed over by Italy.

"So..the 'elephant appreciation club' is exactly how it sounds?"

"Basically. We only get to see Yamir every third month, though."

"Yamir is the elephant?"

"Yes."

"So, you read about, talk about, and write and draw about elephants, and three times a year you get visit from an elephant?"

"That's our club!" Thailand said proudly.

Japan jotted the last of the notes down. Germany sighed. _There's no end to these strange clubs._

"Well, thank you for your time. We have one more interview, and then Italy and I have a meeting to attend."

"Really?" Italy called from next to Yamir's trunk.

"It's Tuesday."

"Oh, right." Italy patted Yamir fondly on the trunk before running after his comrades to the next stop.

* * *

_Dragged out one panel_ much _farther than I should have, but it's ok for just being a quick update. I have_ another_ paper due on Friday, so it's unlikely I'll get around to_ _updating again until the weekend. _


	7. The Music Club and Nordic Club

_I should be writing a research paper...but I'm writing this instead._

* * *

"Alright. Japan," Germany said, handing the nation a piece of the list, "you cover the last two on this list, and Italy and I will talk to this group before our meeting. I have to be there early, because I set it up. We'll meet you back in the common room at nineteen."

* * *

Japan headed up by himself to the choral room again, this time occupied by not only the choral club, but a small amount of other students. He knocked tentatively. He was met at the door by Prussia, holding a mop.

"Oh, hey!" he said with what was supposed to be a smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Move, Prussia," said another voice as Austria pushed his the hemi-nation out of the way. "Oh, Japan, it's you. What brings you to the music club?"

"Well, if you wouldn't mind, I would like to interview your club for the newspaper this month. If I'm not trespassing on any activities. If so, perhaps we could reschedule."

"You need to learn to be more assertive. I could teach you that!" Prussia said, flashing his smirk-smile again. Austria rolled his eyes.

"Go play with your mop," he said as he showed Japan inside.

"It's not a mop! It's a guitar! You're just jealous you can't play as awesomely as I can!"

Austria gave Japan an exasperated look. "Anyway, so what do you need to know about us?"

"Well...just what you do, how often you meet, who runs the meetings, just about you. It doesn't have to be long."

"It's obvious _I _run things around here!" Prussia called, holding the mop in a way that clearly suggested guitar.

"You're full of it," Austria called back. "I'm the president of the club. _He_ does nothing but cause trouble and play that mop. I'd take him much more seriously as a member if he actually _brought_ his guitar. He's not bad, he just doesn't want to act like part of the club. Then again," he said, looking back as Prussia started fingering imaginary strings, "it's probably quieter as is."

"What exactly do you do?"

"We practice. perform, and appreciate music. Every month we feature a new instrument from a different part of the world. A guest comes in and demonstrates it. Doesn't mean they're good at it, but they are okay. I just never want to hear the banjo again."

"Well, if I don't run things around here, how can we fix that?"

"_Prussia_. Go away."

* * *

"Alright. This is our last club for the day. Then we have to get up to the meeting room." Germany knocked on the door loudly. A spiky-haired blond answered.

"Hey!" Denmark said, flinging the door open the rest of the way. "What can I help you with?"

"According to my list, you're the Nordic club?" Germany asked.

"Indeed!"

"We're from the school newspaper, and we're doing clubs," Germany explained. "Are you available for an interview?"

"Hey, guys! We're gonna be in the paper!" Denmark led the newspaper duo in the room. "Hey, do you two have a camera? You can take some photos." Behind him, Norway shook his head. "Ok, ask us anything!" Denmark yelled as he took his seat.

Germany looked at Italy. "Well, what does the Nordic club do?" Italy said.

"That's an easy question! Our primary goal is to maintain our rule over this school!" Denmark announced. "To do that, we put out awesome new furniture designs every day!" Looking around, not everyone agreed with his statement. Norway rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed by him. Sweden just kept staring at him. Iceland was eyeing the door, contemplating if he should leave.

"Actually," Finland interjected, "we just talk about the furniture. Usually while we have a snack! We just talk. This is more of a social gathering than a club."

"It still sounds like fun!" Italy said excitedly. "Do you have any of those furniture designs? I bet Japan would like to see them, too!"

"Yeah, we have a few." Norway shuffled through a stack of papers.

"Hey, Italy, here's something I betcha didn't know!" Denmark said as Norway handed Germany some older designs. "When any of the Nordics find themselves in a tight spot, Nordic furniture from all over the world comes together to for a giant robot! It comes to helps us out!"

Italy's eyes grew wide. "Really!? It sounds like something Japan had told me about!"

Denmark put smiled smugly. "Well, he might have gotten the idea from us..." he said, just before a pair of arms lifted him upright about the throat. Sweden looked disapprovingly at him.

"He's lying." Italy actually looked disappointed.

Germany took down the last few notes and stood. "Well, thank you for your time, but I have to go set up the meeting."

"Oh?" Denmark said as Sweden put him down. "Is that today?" Germany nodded. "Well, okay, then, see ya!"

* * *

Germany put all the notes in the folder and tucked it in his bag. He looked up at Italy writing something.

"What is that?"

"Oh, I'm doing my article of the siesta club! I can have it done by the end of the week!"

"You _do _know you have other parts of this to write, don't you?"

"Really? I better get started: this is just the prewrite."

"Never mind that," Germany said. "It's seventeen." Voices outside the door grew louder. _It's only every two weeks,_ he kept reminding himself as he took his spot at the head of the long table. "Italy, since you don't do anything anyway, take the notes for the club. On second thought, I'll just write from experience."

* * *

_If anyone's familiar with student council, you have a clue what's coming over the next few days._


	8. Intro to Student Gov: the European Union

_I'm never reading _The Odyssey _again_. _This paper is going absolutely nowhere._ _Also, I'll be introducing OC's in here. You'll know them when you see them. I might come back and change them up a bit if/when they get real characters. I've been looking forward to this part (that's why it's long and detailed: I made this part up completely and have details to work with)._

* * *

Japan knocked again on the door of a small classroom. There were a number of clubs that met in that room at any given time. at least twenty-seven that they knew of. How Germany had let them stay on the list was beyond Japan.

"Hey," said a voice behind him. He turned to see Seychelles and Australia walking up the hall. "Looking for someone?" she said.

"Ah, well, there are supposed to be a number of clubs that meet here. You wouldn't happen to know if any of them are coming?"

Both nations shook their heads as New Zealand caught up.

"That room is weird," Australia said.

"Oh," New Zealand replied, "is this the room of the phantom clubs?" Australia nodded.

"Phantom clubs?" Japan asked.

"Yeah," Seychelles said. "It's always occupied, reserved for some weird club or other, but no one's ever there. Plus, no one uses it during classes, either. So, it's rumored to be haunted by clubs of the past."

_Really? _Japan thought skeptically.

"Sorry we couldn't help, mate. Oh, Japan, if you're not busy, you wanna play some Frisbee?" Australia held up a flying disc he had been carrying.

"No, that's fine," was what Japan meant to say before he got stuck somehow playing with several overly-energetic nations. As he fell to the sidelines after dodging the toy thrown by Cameroon, he thought to himself, _I wonder how Germany and Italy are doing at their club._

* * *

Not much better.

Germany felt his blood pressure rise as the twenty-six other member states came in, already arguing. Several years back, someone decided it would be a great idea if all the countries of Europe made a club. No one ever figured out why that was. It used to be peaceful, when they got started and there were only six of them, those six being Germany himself, Italy (and his brother), France, Belgium, Luxembourg and the Netherlands. Okay, it wasn't all that peaceful. But it was better than it is now, with nearly five times their original number assembled and squabbling.

Hungary sat herself right next to Germany, as to get as far away from Romania as was possible, who followed her over anyway to continue the arguement. On the other side of the room sat Slovakia, who disliked being anywhere near Hungary, and wouldn't go out of his way to argue with her, since it meant he'd have to be close to her. His sister Czechia sat next to him, though she kept her own eye on Austria. Meanwhile, England, representing all his brothers this month to_ prevent_ fighting, was demonstrating his talent for bickering by carrying on with both his sister Ireland and France at the same time. Poland and Lithuania sat together on Germany's other side. Estonia and Finland's conversation was one of the few civil exchanges, though they were being watched closely by Sweden. Italy's brother Romano (no doubt wondering why he was missing his "Going Home" meeting for this) kept flicking his eyes from North Italy's essay to Germany at the head of the table, eyes closed, a vein popping in his temple.

Slamming his hands down on the table, Germany shouted, "Sit down and be quiet! No, do not shuffle!" he yelled as Ireland went to switch seats with Bulgaria. "Sit! We should've started five minutes ago! You don't want to be here and I don't want to have to put up with you, so the less you fight in here, the faster you can all get away from each other! Now, let's begin, shall we?"

While everyone thought the idea to have European nations cooperate was a good one, none of them really _wanted_ to. Much less did anyone enjoy the position of Union president. Unfortunately for Germany, that was the place he found himself stuck.

He looked at the wall by the door, where the six candidate members were standing, unsure of what to do next. Germany admired the pledges to some degree: they were forced to attend every meeting, had no say in any matters brought up, and had to put up with the constant fighting and noise, what with every nation trying to outshout the others. And _they stuck around anyway._ Of course, that could be said about any member: it was a wonder any of the student governments were still around.

"Croatia, sit next to Latvia. Trust me, he will not bite you. The rest of you, observe from the other end." All six did as they were told, though none looked too thrilled to be where they were. Serbia made a point to sit as far away from Croatia as he could, though not before Turkey took the spot he figured was farthest from Greece. Macedonia rolled his eyes and sunk in the seat next to Iceland. When they were sufficiently settled down as a collective, Germany took his eyes away for a second to look through his notes.

_Alright. You've done this before. Let's see...what exactly goes on here?_

_First, we discuss our economy. Unfortunately..._

"First thing up is the Eurozone report. Whose week was it to record?"

"Great, first thing we discuss every time!" Denmark said, leaning back in his chair. "I don't use it; why do I bother coming on time?"

"If you don't want to be here, Denmark, just leave," Poland said, smirking slightly.

"If I leave, I don't get to argue the border dispute with you!" Denmark snapped back.

"It was my week, Germany," Belgium said, slightly startling Germany out of his fixation on the squabble. She handed in her report amidst all the ruckus the two countries were starting.

"And?" She shrugged and flapped the paper feebly. He took it. "You aren't going to report for the group?"

"Will I be heard?" she said, leaning closer to him so she could be.

_Next,_ he thought as she took her spot between Malta and Estonia. He banged on the table to get the group's attention back.

"Well, since you all want to talk about the international disputes - "

The room erupted in fights again. Denmark and Poland arguing about the Baltic Sea was joined by a plethora of other nonsense, most of which wasn't political, but simply based on the fact that they didn't like each other.

_And after this was supposed to be the talk on climate, but..._

Germany stood; if any less noise was being made, it would have commanded everyone's attention (it usually did). When it didn't, Germany just shook his head. He slammed so hard on the old table it nearly cracked the legs. Everyone looked up at him.

"Now, then. Since you have to behave like children and not let anything get done around here, we can dismiss. Or, we can behave like adults and get our own problems addressed before we take ourselves before the student council tomorrow. You pick." No one said another word, nor did any one leave.

"Alright. Since you're all still here, we'll move right into the climate, then any additional problems between yourselves can be fought after dismissal. We'll take them up tomorrow."

* * *

Japan finished climbing the stairs, slightly dazed from taking the flying disc to the head twice. He was planning on meeting the other two outside their meeting room.

And was met with a myriad of voices. Two hallways down.

Japan turned around and left, heading back to the meeting place agreed upon earlier, figuring not only was it where they all knew they'd be, it was probably safer that way.

* * *

_Yay. I think I'll actually dedicate the entire either next chapter or the one after to the student council meeting. I really have to finish this paper, so I _cannot_ write fanfic tomorrow. See you this weekend!_


	9. Tuesday Night Recap (filler)

_Ok: I currently have no ideas and am looking at another paper being assigned in a week or so, and a concept board. So, here's just a recap chapter._

* * *

Japan had been waiting in the room for about a half hour before Italy came in, Germany looking very tired behind him.

"Ah. The EU is doing as good as ever, I see," Japan noted.

"We got a lot of discussion done!" Italy announced.

"But none of what we needed!" Germany spit out. "Anyway, I was going to see if we could still get into the club room tonight and work on some of these articles. We need these written in two weeks, so we better get started. Are you with us, Japan?"

"I finished the outline for the _siesta_ club, Japan!" Italy said, showing off his work to the island nation as they traversed the darkening hallways. Japan nodded at it: Italy had put it in Italian.

"So, Japan, how were your interviews?" Germany asked.

"I'd like to visit the music club again next week: they're demonstrating the dijuridu."

"The what?"

"It's some kind of Australian horn. I was going to ask him about it himself when I saw him earlier, but didn't find the time. Though did you know there's a petition going around for a Frisbee Club? I won't be signing it..."

"It would fit in with our weekend activities. What about the clubs in 324?"

"Oh, the phantom clubs," Japan muttered.

"The what?" Germany asked, fingering his key as they approached the press's room.

"No one was there. Perhaps they all had somewhere else to be."

"It would make sense. Very few clubs _don't_ overlap with our meeting."

"And how were your interviews?"

"To say the least, noisy. Other...regional clubs meet on Thursday. Those won't be too fun."

"They sound like fun to me!" Italy said.

"Here," Germany said, thrusting the folder into Italy's chest.

"Hey, Japan, check these out," Italy said, pulling out Norway's furniture designs. "And when they come together, they make a robot!"

"Really?" Japan's eyes grew slightly, mildly impressed.

"_No,_" Germany said emphatically, pulling the door open.

"So..." Japan started hesitantly as the door swung shut behind him. "How badly did the European council go?"

Germany wouldn't speak. "Well, everyone was shouting, a shoe got thrown, I _think_ by Poland, and finally Turkey took a swing at Greece and hit Serbia instead, and that's when Germany decided to dismiss," Italy said in a small voice, as to not upset Germany by bringing it up.

"That particular article will need some serious work. I took all mental notes so it will fall to me," Germany said.

"It certainly sounds like it will be quite a read," Japan noted.

"Well, don't forget, the Union needs to keep its appearance up for the rest of the world. None of us present ourselves in all our dysfunctionality."

_We already know there's something wrong with Europe. _"I understand."

* * *

Germany looked up at the light flickering. _Must need replacing._ He looked around at his comrades. As expected, Italy was fast asleep, but he knew he kept them out too long when Japan had nodded off. He sighed. They needed to finish this, but them sleeping wasn't getting them anywhere, either.

"Hey, Japan," Germany said, nudging the island nation's arm. The black head raised itself from the arm cradle.

"Right. I...I don't know what came over me," he said, sounding embarrassed.

"It's called exhaustion. Let's go. You get the papers; I'll get the Italian."

"So," Japan said, stifling a yawn as he walked behind Germany, Italy flung over the taller nation's shoulder, "which of us is covering tomorrow's pre-meeting, Germany-san?"

"I suppose I'll do it. I'm usually up that early anyway."

"I wonder if it will be the same as it was when we were officers."

"With the same five crazy people in charge? Undoubtedly. Might be worse if no one knows what they're doing to run the meeting."

"As long as they have something to bring to the large group, we should be fine," Germany huffed as they approached the common room door. "I suppose we can meet in the club room after class and walk up together? Gather our materials and be prepared for the venture into hell?"

Both of them knew what was coming. Germany felt his blood pressure go up again, same as it had that very afternoon. Wednesday's were no one's favorite days for a reason.

* * *

_Dijuridu = didgeridoo. Really is an Australian horn, similar to the European alpenhorn. I like my spelling better._


	10. Class Officers: the Security Council

_Over a month without an update? Unacceptable! Especially since I've been off for the last week. So I was thinking I would do a quick update to let you know the story wasn't dead, and perhaps move on to the main chapter later this coming week._

* * *

Japan took his seat next to Belize in his earliest class. He had his first class Wednesday with Germany and wanted to turn in his articles, discuss the "phantom clubs", and discuss how, or even if, they were going to cover the student council meeting.

Germany entered the classroom nearly late, an irregularity for him. Japan watched him cross the room and fall into the chair between Austria and Slovenia. He had a look on his face he usually reserved for when he was denied cooperation.

Japan caught up to Germany at the end of class. "How was the group this morning?" Germany didn't answer. "Was it as bad as you remember?"

Germany shook his head, grimacing. "No. If anything, they're more dysfunctional than they used to be."

* * *

_Germany woke early to make it to the first meeting of Wednesday. The fifteen student officers met early to discuss the best way to conduct the meeting held right after classes let out. _

_The student council was founded to make all the grand fighting go away. While a few of the nations whose glory days were set back when there was a lot of fighting, they were a bit sad to see it go, but generally agreed that it was the best option for everyone. _

_Five officers had been the same since the second incarnation, and the other ten run on terms. Germany was not too pleased early on that the five permanent officers were the ones who had ultimately beaten him during the second of the biggest gang wars in the school's history. These days...he wasn't too pleased that the same five members were complete and total retards who had no clue what they were doing._

_He entered, clipboard in hand to the same meeting room the EU had assembled, where seven of the fifteen had assembled. He took a seat between India and where Portugal showed up two seconds later._

_"What's that for, then?" Portugal asked upon entry, pointing at the clipboard._

_"Notes," Germany said._

_"Ah, is this on your list for the paper as well?" India asked._

_"Yes. As is the meeting later."_

_"He's been at this for a while, then?" Portugal said, leaning back to see around Germany to India. "Well, I look forward to seeing how you interpret _that_ mess."_

* * *

"And?"

"And what?" Germany said as he approached his next class.

Japan raised his eyebrow slightly. "And, what happened after that?"

"After what? The meeting?"

"No, the beginning!"

"That _was_ the whole meeting. Guatemala tried to take control, was eventually drowned out by America, and then he and Russia started bickering like no tomorrow. Pakistan actually got up and left. We got so much more done last month when I was leading the meetings." Germany's eyes narrowed and he fell into the wall. "I can only hope the main meeting goes better."

"Like it did last month? Honestly, it's a wonder we get anything done at all, considering who we put in charge of meetings."

"Right."

"Ah, and also, there's a smaller meeting going on after classes."

"Of what? Everyone will be at the student council!"

"No...only _member states_ will be at the student council. There's something else going on for...I think it was...Well, Italy knows, we can ask him at break."

"Are we supposed to cover that, Japan?"

"Shouldn't we?"

"I suppose we _should_, but we _can't_. All three of us will be at the meeting. We'll have to let this one go."

"Like I said, we can ask Italy about it later."

* * *

"Yeah. Something about places that run themselves..." Italy trailed for a few seconds. "Not sure what it means. I overheard Taiwan talking about it yesterday and forgot to say something."

"She isn't _expecting_ us, is she?" Germany asked, knowing the Italian's incapacity for keeping his mouth shut.

"Well, they _are_ a club, aren't they?"

"Not exactly, Italy," Japan said, putting his hand on Germany's wrist as the latter went to rise from his seat. "Can't you yell from here?"

"Italy, we're all expected at the meeting later! None of us can _cover_ that insignificant meeting!" Germany said loudly, wrenching his hand out of Japan's. "How are we going to do that? Cancel with her!"

Italy thought for a few seconds. "What if Romano took over for me at the meeting? He's been to them all, anyway! He knows what's going on!"

"Firstly, you two share a brain and I doubt he can function in a meeting without you, and vice versa," Germany said, raising a finger. As he raised the second, he continued, "Secondly, I've read your notes, and if I wasn't there for the interview, I'd have no idea what you were talking about."

"Well, what if I ask her for _her _notes? Would that work?"

"Do you remember what I said yesterday about the EU not presenting ourselves in all our dysfunction?" Germany started, becoming visibly irritated.

"Germany-san, I think Italy-san was asleep."

"I can only assume Taiwan would do the same to her notes as well. That is _not_ the correct way to do journalism. We either collect it ourselves or not at all."

Italy went quiet and actually stayed that way through the rest of the lunch period. As activity around the trio signaled a return to class, he decided to bring up one last idea. "What if I found someone who could take the notes for us? Someone impartial, who wouldn't be affected at all by the goings-on!" His comrades looked at him to show they were listening. "Don't worry; he'll do it just like me!"

"Italy, all I know is you better be at that meeting later," muttered Germany just audibly over the noise around them. To be honest, Germany would have rather Italy's replacement idea to be better that him at notes. "Tell me about it on the way to lab. Japan, we'll fill you in later."

* * *

___(_**A/N:** So, we started on the actual student council, with the class officer meeting. No, there aren't actual "classes" here, but bear with me. The UN has a "security council" of 15 member states: 5 permanent members (the former Allied Forces) and 10 who rotate. As of October 2012 (when this story was published), the 10 rotating members were Azerbaijan, Colombia, Guatemala, Germany (how convenient), India, Morocco, Pakistan, Portugal, South Africa and Togo, with Guatemala being the president for October (they change president monthly).)

_This was a bit of a cop-out chapter, because with there being no canon Guatemala (and him sort of LEADING the meeting) I couldn't think of what else to do._

_Also, I think i read somewhere the UN is a character? I really don't like that interpretation, so an organization will rather be a meeting of nations rather than one._


End file.
